People's Republic of Uplands

I feel I need to come clean. 2 years ago we decided to make a grand political gesture to draw attention to the many issues facing us, the citizens of Uplands. We decided that the best form of non-violent protest was to add hair-growth hormones to the drinking water supplies in the secret government reservoir buried in front of Cwmdonkin Terrace.

How were we to know that the effect would not be quite as we hoped? Instead of an overnight uprising against, well, you know, all the stuff that pees us off we are now left with two seemingly permanent issues.

1. We do seem to have an increase in hairy men wandering the streets. I assume this is entirely our fault and take full responsibility. Luckily, the female inhabitants of PRU seem to be immune to the effects of the hormone. The same can not be said, unfortunately, for our weekend mini-bus visitors of the fairer sex, who we can only assume are so incredibly hirsute due to the amount of water in the ice cubes put in their glasses of Pinot Grigio.
2. We have inadvertently made Uplands into a Disneyland of the hair-based service providers. Whereas at one point concerns were raised about the number of coffee shops, we are now inundated with hairdressers, barbers, pube-sculptors and the like. This is clearly our responsibility and steps are in place to rectify our over-enthusiasm with hair-growth hormone.

Peace, Love and Cakes

PRU